I discovered I was pregnant my junior year of college. At the time, I had a roommate and we lived in the “cool” dorms.
So that summer I went to New York and had a roommate there as part of the internship program I was completing. Then when I came back home to Ohio from the internship, I moved in with my boyfriend and we have been living together ever since.
As a result, I have never (ever) lived on my own.
I wonder about this sometimes, when the noise levels in my house rise and I want nothing more than for my husband to take the kids outside (anywhere) to give me a moment to be home by myself. Just by myself.
My husband is good (sometimes) at knowing when I need a break and quietly suggesting that I go out to the movies or the mall. But sometimes, I just want to be by myself in my own home, that I bust my butt every month to pay the mortgage on.
I just want to lie across my bed and feel the breeze from the ceiling fan without having to get up and bust up the fight that my two kids are surely having.
I want to put on my pajamas and lounge on the couch and spend an entire Saturday watching Arrested Development on Netflix. I want to grab some takeout and eat it in bed. I want to clean up, if I chose, and have the house stay that way for more than 30 minutes. I want time to actually organize my closet, which has been in a state of haphazardness since 2005.
It’s hard to just “be” in the house when the little ones are there. I’m constantly on the move, making lunches, overseeing homework, making dinner, playing on the floor, fetching toys that roll under the couch. I’ve never come home from work and it was just me to worry about.
I wonder if I missed out on something. Don’t get me wrong – I love my kids and I love my husband and it’s cool that they’re there. I love living with them. But sometimes. Sometimes I wish I had some quiet. And peace.
Did you live on your own before having kids? Did you enjoy the experience? Do you remember that time fondly?
In college, my roommate moved out and I got to enjoy my room to myself, but then when I had to move off campus, I moved in with my boyfriend too. It was three years before, I had Moo though. So, I guess I’ve sort of lived alone or something close to it before I had kids. There are very few days that I miss it. Sounds crazy but true.
Wow! I just thought about it and I have never lived alone. I wonder how that feels. After high school my husband and I moved in together and has been that way ever since. I am not sure if I could tolerate living alone. I love the noisiness of the house with the kids and husband.
I lived by myself in college for 3 years. I do look back on that time fondly because I could lay around all day or just generally live completely by my own schedule. I think the experience also taught me a bit about maintaining a home and finances. However, I think it made it a harder adjustment to having kids because I was used to such unlimited free time. I still struggle with the idea that I am not entitled to hours of “me time” each day!
I have never lived alone. In college I had a roommate. After my daughter was born though, I got an apartment for just she and I, I didn’t live with my boyfriend, and although I wasn’t living alone because she was there, it felt like living alone in comparison to being married and living with a spouse. And she always spent a few days per week with her dad, so I guess my answer is yes and no. I have never lived alone, alone. But I feel like I’ve had a small sampling of the experience!
Yes – I lived on my own for years. I really wanted that experience. My aunt was a young mommy. She moved from living with my mom and I to living with her husband and kids. And she would make me PROMISE to one day live on my own. I stayed home for college because my school was a train ride away. But when I went to law school, I lived alone. And when I moved back to NYC to work, I lived alone. I lived alone for about 5 years and then my husband and I lived together. I would not change my home life now. I love having people in the house and can’t imagine living by myself one bit! I’d be scared but I surely loved the experience of not having to think about or answer to anyone. The “me” time was great and now, I won’t say that it is not something that I “never” experienced. My aunt passed away a few years ago but I thank her for this life lesson and learned a lot from her. I miss her.
I guess I’ve never lived on my own either. Lately the feelings of “leave me alone” and “I’m so lonely” have been taking turns in my head. It feels great to know others feel like this as well. Ahhh and staying in pajamas and watching netflix without cleaning sounds like a dream world.
I lived completely on my own twice–once when I studied abroad in France, which should go without saying that it was incredible, and again right before I got pregnant my senior year of college. Both experiences were only about a month, but I loved that time by myself. Try to not to worry about what you missed though Tara, the time will come when you will be alone…:)