About Me
The mission of TheYoungMommyLife.com
I created this site as a space where moms could speak the truth about young motherhood, whatever that means for you. I wanted to share my journey and give other young moms a voice, a place to feel like they belong. So many of the moms I’ve met through this site have gone through the same things – but we’ve all come out stronger. Join me as we discuss what it means to be a young mom – the good, the bad and the ugly.
Whether married or single, black or white, middle class or poor, we’re all young moms. Let’s share our story.
This website is designed to help young mothers everywhere make informed decisions about:
- Their relationships. Who you’re with says a lot about what your life is like. YML is designed to help young mothers make the most of their relationships and give them the strength to see that they deserve the very best that their partner can offer.
- Their education. Since many of these mothers are still in school, part of YML’s mission is to connect them with resources to make sure they are able to get into the school of their choice, pay for it, and assemble the support system they need to make it to graduation.
- Their careers. In today’s society, it is easier than ever to create your own business, or to develop a few side hustles to bring in additional income. YML is dedicated to providing a platform for young mothers who are on the entrepreneurial path. The site will also provide resources to other young mothers who are interested in beginning that journey as well.
- Their parenting style. Young mothers can at times feel like they were “kidnapped into motherhood” and so there wasn’t much thought about what kind of mother they would be. It was more like, “Ready or not, here they come.” YML is the place where we can explore what motherhood looks like in our eyes and challenge ourselves to do better for our children’s sake.
About me: The short version
I’m a Midwestern Mama of two with a background in journalism and public relations. I revel in creating great content, whether online, in print, or through in-person workshops. I’m the author of Make It Happen, a “get your career right” guidebook for the mothers who are still wondering what they want to be when they grow up. In addition, I’m managing editor of BlackandMarriedWithKids.com, the premiere online space for black love and marriage. In my copious free time (ha!), I contribute articles for Loop21.com, Momtourage.com, Disney, and countless others. I currently work as a copyeditor with Amazon’s CreateSpace service to turn hopeful authors’ rough drafts into polished works of art. My current passion (besides this blog) is helping small nonprofits hone their message through social media.
About me: The long version
I never felt comfortable around kids. They seemed too needy, too whiny and they never smiled at me.
So when I found myself pregnant at 20, I wasn’t too happy. In fact, I do believe the first words that escaped my mouth once I saw “Pregnant” on the test was, “Oh, s&#@.”
To say that a baby wasn’t in the plans was the understatement of my life.
I simply wasn’t ready to be a mother. I honestly didn’t want to be a mother. Not at that time.
I wanted to get married first.
I wanted to graduate from college first, and not have to worry about how I was going to manage my fall semester when my due date fell in the middle of November.
I wanted to have an actual JOB first, not scrape together paychecks here and there.
When the nurse handed my daughter to me after she was born, I wanted to cry. Not from joy, but fear.
I remember thinking, “Oh, my God. How can they not see that I’m not ready for this? Please Lord, don’t let me screw this up!”
For the first full year of her life, I struggled. Most of my friends and family don’t know it, but I struggled. I never really felt like I knew what I was doing, I would get flustered over the simplest things, I would wonder what my life would have been like if I hadn’t given birth.
It didn’t take long to realize that I had a case of postpartum depression. I felt alienated from all my friends, thrust into motherhood without getting a chance to say goodbye to my freedom.
But as strange as it sounds, part of the reason I was depressed was that I loved my daughter more than anything.
I wanted nothing more than to make her life easier, happier, better. I wanted to give her the best of everything, but I was still in school and my husband was still in his first job out of grad school. On top of that, I had no job. And with journalism jobs drying up left and right, I was nervous that I’d actually be able to get one once I graduated.
But when I walked across that stage to grab my diploma, the fog lifted. My six-month-old daughter smiled and clapped for me and I realized her presence didn’t detract from my life. Instead it made me stronger, more determined and more focused. Everything I’ve done since her birth, everything I’ve accomplished, I owe it all to her.
Finding the happy in the everyday
It is then your job to love them up, and raise them in a way that makes you proud, and take care of your little gifts. I know some days are better than others, and you wish you could have more quiet and less screaming. But they are here for a reason. Maybe that reason hasn’t revealed itself to you yet. But it will. Give it time.
I haven’t talked to you or seen you since high school, I think, but I’ve been keeping up with your trials and success through the wonder that is the internet. I have to tell you that I’m very proud to know you, and I am constantly amazed by all that you are continuously accomplishing in your life. You are blessed with many talents and gifts that you never take for granted. How awesome that is! I wish you many more blessings to come, keep up the good work that you do =)
DO you have a newsletter that can be sent to my email regularly?
Great blog! Very professionally done. I think you’re filling a real need for young moms.
@Eileen – Thanks, ma’am. We need to catch up. Hmmmm….
@Traci – Newsletter coming soon!
@Michael – Thank you! I hope I’m filling a huge void as well….
I say kudos to you and thanks for filling a void for young moms who love their kids but don’t have enough life experience to get credit for it. I am a 26 yr old mother of 4 and I pretty much don’t have any peers to relate to, thanks for giving me one!
What a great site, and great bio! I am looking forward to exploring more about you and your work!
I am so happy I found this website! I am 25 year old married mother of a 6 month old baby girl and work in an environment where I am the only mother in her 20’s…quite possibly in the entire company. So needless to say, I find my co-workers JUST DON’T GET IT
@Shellie – Welcome to the club
Thank you we all need a voice.
i am soooo happy (and relieved) i found this site!!!!!!
Your blog is bookmarked, so I dont lose it again.
I have been reading your post for about a year now and it has given me so much hope in the toughest of times! As a teenager in high school, I was always really motivated to succeed, had great grades, and was in a lot of extracurricular programs. So after I had my first son in high school, people (including a lot of my family members) told me that I had wasted my life and that it was over. I was extremely depressed afterwards and isolated myself from everyone except my (now) husband who has been there through every step of the way. But now, even with the birth of our second child (who will be a year old on the 31st), I know that things will work out and I am now slowly but surely fighting to succeed again and go after my dreams. And, I know without a doubt, that with the grace of God, I can do ANYTHING!
SO thanks for giving that hope to all other young moms like me! You are a God send!
@Amanda – I knew there were more women/moms like me out there and I’m glad you found me! Come back often!!