1. I use baby wipes for everything. And I mean everything.
2. I sniff butts. For “poo checks.”
3. I have random diapers (unused!) in the bottom of my purse.
4. I’ve caught spit up in my hand more times than I can count. And chewed food.
5. I watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse when my kids aren’t home. And Handy Manny. And I get too involved in the episodes, talking back to the TV and everything. “Now, Mickey, why wouldn’t you just walk to Mickey park? Did you have to call ‘Toodles’?”
6. I’m intrigued when my kids’ poop changes color. (Fruit snacks = bright green poop)
7. I talk about myself in third person. “Mommy’s hungry. What should Mommy eat for dinner?” It’s even more embarassing when I’m by myself.
8. I say everything I’m doing out loud. “Once we finish dinner, we’re going to clean up.” Then: “Okay, we’re cleaning up. Thank you for helping me clean up.” Then: “Now we’re going upstairs.” “Now we’re getting our PJ’s on.” “Now we’re reading our bedtime stories.” Ugh. Make me stop!
9. I hear “phantom” baby cries. I’ll be nice and cozy in bed, and then at 2 a.m. I’ll SWEAR I hear a kid crying. I’ll GET OUT OF BED to go check and turns out the kids are sleeping nice and soundly. WTF is wrong with me?
10. My kids are so cute that sometimes I wish I could squish ’em and put ’em back in my belly and start over and love ’em from the beginning. (Does that sound weird to anyone else? LOL)
11. I cook meals based almost solely on how messy it will be to clean off the floor.
12. When I’m out in public and I hear a kid screaming, all I can think is, “Glad it’s not mine.”
13. I hate when people think they’ll be a great mom because they have been a babysitter for a while. NOT.THE.SAME.THING.
Am I alone in some of these? What are some of your mommy-isms?
OmG!!! this sounds just like me!!!! I do every single one of these lol. It’s funny how having kids changes you.
lmao, i do #7 too. when im at work during the day or running errands alone, in my mind im mentally checking off my “to do” list and find myself referring to myself as “okay, now mommy has to run in the grocery store real quick.” When i catch myself i just chuckle and shake my head.
Ha ha! This could be a universal list!
LOL, I’m guilty of most of these things too…1,2,3,4,6,7,8,9,12, and especially 13. 10 doesn’t sound weird to me at all, but I’ve never thought of that…lol
I was in my Bio 103 class a few semesters ago and my professor bought us donuts the last day of class to have a party and celebrate that we all passed the horrible class. So I opened up my purse, grabbed my baggie of wipes, and announced that I had wipes for anyone who wanted to use one. The professor gave me the weirdest look and said “You carry wipes with you?!” I said, “yeah, and I have diapers too…” Then he remembered that I had a son. It was pretty amusing the looks I got…
Oh, and has anyone else noticed that because you’re now a mom, your name automatically gets forgotten and swept away, and all you are known as is “mom” now? Everywhere I go. Whether it be the hospital, therapy, the preschool…I’m “mom”. No longer “Katie”. Just “mom”.
This list could be my own. The poo checks, the phantom baby cries, and especially the various uses of baby wipes!
Can we get that “S” on our chest now? We all deserve it!
Hugs and Mocha,
Stesha
This list is so me, I’m so happy I’m not the only one :o)
Great list twin, I can definitely relate to A LOT of those. A few of mine are…
*When I’m at work and I have to use the bathroom, depending on where I’m at for the day I will ask someone to cover the lab or my desk so that I can go POTTY
*I complain about the cost of clothes, especially like just a pair of pants or a shirt, costing so much, yet I will turn around and buy my son a $50 TOY ::hangs head in shame::
*Every time I go in a store with my son, I hardly ever leave without getting him something. Even if that means not getting everything I came in there for ::hangs head in shame again::
*I’m obsessed with “baby smells”. I love the Pink Johnson & Johnson lotion, I even buy their baby cologne. Yes, they do make that, don’t judge me
*As crazy and just plain weird as Yo Gabba Gabba is, I still try to make it home by 6:30 so we can watch it. Sometimes I’m more into it than my son!
*When ever I have to take my son to the doctors with me, I always pray before we go in that he isn’t “THAT” kid, yall know the ones I’m talking about
*Not only have I gotten a bigger purse to carry around diapers and wipes, but you can also find fruit snacks, gerber melts, and butt cream in there too
*When my co-worker told me about John Mayer saying the “N” word, I said, “…well what’s so bad about him saying ‘no’, did he refuse to do something charitable?!” Yeah, totally a mom and a dork!
*Every time I look at my son’s baby pics, I seriously get sad that the time went by so fast and I can never get those moments back. I really miss him being inside me and being a little baby, now he’s a big boy :-/
*Not only do I know like ALL of the theme songs on Nick Jr. but sometimes when I’m up late at night, I’m singing them because they’re stuck in my head
*I keep an emergency binkie in my coat pocket, the cup holder in the car, as well as his diaper bag
*I have juice boxes stored behind the passenger seat, as well as graham cracker packets
*I’ve forgotten how some foods actually taste since I basically just put it in my mouth and swallow. No time for actually enjoying a meal!
I could go on and on!
@Courtney – Okay, I got stuck while reading your list. They make baby cologne? Really? Where have I been? And that Johnson and Johnson baby lotion just makes me swoon. Smells so good. Now I want to go buy some…Hmmm…
And yes, I am cracking up at some of these. It’s funny how much moms have in common, isn’t it?
You’re definitely not alone, lol. I have done all and still do some of these!
– I will pull barettes and Macdonald’s happy meal toys out of my purse when searching for loose change.
– My skin gets more baby oil than my daughter’s does sometimes. Baby oil gel is the BEST!
– If I have to hit the brakes while driving, its not unusual for me to throw my right arm across an adult passenger’s chest, pressing them back against their seat.
You’re SO not alone! This list screams meme, and I’m so stealing the concept and posting it on my blog (and linking to this post, of course)! I especially love #s 7, 9, 12, 13.
Oh yes!! So true! What a fun post
OMG!! I loved this list LOL
I have a 10 month old and this was the funniest thing I’ve see all day!!! And now that she’s getting older/walking I did think #10… that I just wanted to start all over with her…
too funny
OMG – I say everything out loud too (except I thought it was cute – haha!) Seriously, I didn’t realize I did that until you said it.
And on that last one about people who think they’ll be great moms – I just had a woman comment to me about her DOG in the same vein! Now, I love dogs like anybody, but when she said “I put him in his crate during the day otherwise he’s in my face and around me all the time and I can’t get work done. I imagine it’s like a kid…” I knew it was time for me to head in the other direction….!
Great blog Tara!
Swati
Love this! Especially #11. Impressed that you’re cooking and clean your floor!
Winks & Smiles,
Wifey
All of the above…lol!
Tara, shoot me an email and I can order some of the Johnson & Johnson scented cologne. I spray it on my sheets:)
#6…its gets very interesting with storebrought cupcakes with the colorful icing.
Great post.
3,7,9,10 and 12 are so me!
This is HILARIOUS! I do ALL of these things too. Babysitting is sooo not the same as motherhood. 24/7. Talking about myself in the third person and “think-alouds?” Yea, I do that too. All the time. LOL. And I talk in my “nice” voice or “mommy” voice all the time too. Oh motherhood…
.-= Alicia @Mommy Delicious´s last blog ..Sometimes Saying No Means I Love You =-.