#FeminismIsForTeenMomsToo: When Do We Stop Treating Pregnancy Like A Punishment?

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It’s the reason I hid my first pregnancy, scrambling to find loose shirts to camuflage what could have been one of the happiest times of my life. But I didn’t feel happy. I wasn’t in awe of what my body could do. Instead I was ashamed and fearful, and I carried that well into my daughter’s first year. I only have a handful of pregnancy photos from my first pregnancy, because most of my time was spent in the mirror playing “I guess this hides my bump” before I left the house each morning.

When you heap shame onto a pregnant woman, you’re doing more than just projecting your own issues. You’re creating an atmosphere where failure is the norm. It’s expected. But it’s not okay to lull people into thinking that statistics are absolutes. They’re not.

I was largely silent during the #FeminismIsForTeenMomsToo Twitter discussion (started by @NatashaVianna) yesterday because I was not, in fact, a teen mother. A 20-year-old with a baby face almost qualifies by the way people treat you, but to truly walk in the shoes of a woman who was pregnant at 15? I can not do that.

So instead I was silent. It wasn’t until the hashtag took over my Twitter stream that I realized that a good 70% of the women I adore and admire are in fact teen mothers. I made a conscious decision to only surround myself with people who can lift me higher and this is the crew I found myself in. They are amazing people, not the exception to the rule, but the new blueprint for what early motherhood can look like if people just stop finger-pointing and blaming and instead focus on treating young parents with respect. Can I get an Amen? 

Because in 2013, we’re still having conversations like this….




See the continuing conversation here on Twitter and add your voice.


  1. […] I’ve written a lot online about teen pregnancy (especially on Twitter, via #teenpreg & #FeminismIsForTeenMomsToo), as well as  my prochoice novel, THE DECISION: […]