16 & Pregnant blew my mind

The most compelling hour of TV last week was no doubt the latest episode of MTV’s 16 & Pregnant.

Now – you guys know I watch the show. You watch the show. We’ve already talked about it. But I swear to you when I watched this, my heart just crumbled. Into a million itty-bitty pieces. I haven’t sat with my mouth wide open like this in a long time. Let’s recap, shall we?

Christinna is a 17-year-old New York state gal who moved with her mom down south. She met a boy. Captain of the football team.

8 months later….surprise!

Christinna and Isiah are in love (I guess) and they’re trying to make it work. Before baby, Christinna had finished high school early so she could go away to college with Isiah, who has a football scholarship to an unknown university.

But now? Isiah has given up his scholarship to stay home and get married to Christinna, much to his mom and grandma’s horror. They can’t stand Christinna, because they see her as the reason their son/grandson will never amount to anything in his life now. Isiah has a job at a sandwich shop, which brings in a whopping $900 a month. Because Christinna’s mom hauled ass back to NY, they all live in Isiah’s grandmother’s (?) house, one big highly dysfunctional family.

Got all that? You can watch the whole episode here:

But watch this quick snippet for a taste:

Oh.my.God. Really? Is she speaking to Christinna through Isiah? Why can’t she, a grown woman, speak to her grandson’s wife directly? And what’s with the diss at the end – …”and you brought something with you?” Thing? Whether she’s referring to the baby or his wife – it’s not cool.
All I have are questions:
1) Why on earth are his people so negative on Isiah’s desire to be a good dad and take care of his child? Granted, I would be disappointed too if my son gave up something he had worked so hard for. I would be crushed. But you know what? Isiah is crushed, too. This isn’t what he had in mind for himself either. But like it or not, the baby is on the way and that baby didn’t ask to be here and to be born into such hostility. In one point in the episode, after a heated “conversation” about Christinna consenting to an DNA test, the grandma said, “I don’t have to have anything to do with the baby.” Really? Your flesh and blood? Ok then…
2) Why couldn’t they both go to college like they planned? He couldn’t have lived in family housing? Could Christinna, I dunno, get a job after the baby was born? Did they really think everything through before determining that college wasn’t a possibility? Of course, when they don’t have the support of their family members, maybe college just seemed like a pipe dream. There was a football player who attended my college and had his wife and daughter with him on campus. Guess what? He’s in the NFL now. And they’re still together. And the wife is working on her degree. Not to say that everyone will live happily ever after, but you’ve got to WORK to reach your dreams. And you’ve got to seek the advice/guidance from people who want to see you succeed as bad you do.
3) Christinna needs some young mom friends. I know that’s not a question – it’s a statement. If you watched the episode, you’ll see she was ambivalent about her pregnancy the whole time. Based on everything that was going on, I can see why. But all she had was a bunch of I’m-going-to-college-and-you’re-not, childless-not-tied-down friends to tell her what she should do. Not to say their advice wasn’t accurate, but sometimes you want to talk to someone who has been there. And having them come visit you when they’re on spring break might not be the thing to lift your spirits.
4) Where in the world is Christinna’s mom? Christinna said she moved with her mom to take care of a sick family member, but then the family member got better so her mom moved back. Let’s recap: she is all alone, in a city that is not her hometown, with no family, and stuck in a house with people who hate her. Hmm, definitely not a good look. This goes back to number 3 – Christina needs a much stronger support system. There is only so much her mom can do hundreds of miles away.
5) And finally – did the grandma REALLY pull out a DNA test and put it on the table? (If you didn’t watch this part, please go to the 35:30 mark and see it. PLEASE.) I can understand wanting to know for sure it was her grandchild. But that’s not the way you do it. Isiah should have requested the test if he really wanted it, not hemming and hawing the way he was. I found it interesting the way that Isiah’s mom and grandma were acting, considering they were single moms as well. Why not try to end the cycle? Some things I will never understand…
Did you see the episode – what did you think? What advice would you give Christinna and Isiah?


  1. In Isiah’s case: classic codependence. You can see how he just completely shut down and let his grandmother impose herself on him when she asked him for a DNA test. His face just falls, even when Christinna is obviously hurt by his family’s actions. Like he’s out of control and just doesn’t want to be there. It’s a hard situation, but there were most likely problems there before Christinna came along.

    I think that giving up college idea is just innocent short-sightedness. He makes a comment about not going to a “sorry junior college” even though most people can save time, money, and get relevant degrees from “sorry” junior college. They’re just out of high school, and naturally don’t know about alternative ways to reach their goals, which his family should be informing them about instead of being negative.

    My advice: they should open their minds about what’s out there, talk to counselors and social workers to find opportunities in their area, and Isiah, please be more consoling and supportive to the mother of your child.

    • @Zsc – I agree. Being aware and ready to take advantage of alternative options is what the mom and grandma SHOULD have been preaching to him. Hit a roadblock? Go AROUND it, don’t give up. But they’re so stuck on being hurt that no one is looking at the big picture.

  2. I certainly think Christina was too nice to them. I would have back slapped somebody for sure if they ever treated me that way. They took advantage of that girl’s weakness because they knew she had been abandoned by her mother and her father and she was pregnant. I blame Isiah for not standing up for his woman like he should have.

    They both need to get themselves a plan and rocket out that spaceship asap. I have a ton of single mom friends who hafve managaed to go to college while, during and after their pregnancy. So, they can not use the baby as an excuse. His mom and grandma especially should be ashamed of themselves and they have the nerve to try to sue MTV talking about they weren’t portrayed right. To hell with that.

    They’re just made that the whole world including their family, friends and church family got to see their true colors on national tv and have probably chastised them for their treatment of that innocent young girl. Furthermore, I was just disgusted that once again with Black people degrading each other instead of using the opportunity to build each other up. Just sad.
    .-= YUMMommy´s last blog ..How the Time Flies =-.

  3. Not only did I watch it….it was filmed in my hometown…SMH. Like I told some of my friends…this young man showed a lot more sacrifice and maturity then men twice his age. I just recently had twins at age 33 and their father, in his 30’s as well, but not ready to be a father yet…let’s just say I could’ve easily filmed an episode called 30 and pregnant to show how immature and selfish grown men can be…

  4. I just kept asking question #2 over and over and over again… It didn’t make any sense to me. If he got a FULL scholarship, clearly the school wanted him! I am sure they could have arranged for him to have family housing or they could have used financial aid to get an apartment off campus. Don’t you feel like finding out how you can contact them and educating them?!? It didn’t make any sense.

  5. I finally caught this episode on TV last night. I shook my head the whole time and hated that boys grandma.

    One thing I ask myself over and over again on all these shows is why are these parents never supportive. Majority of them have been in the same situation themselves so you would think they would give their children advice instead of make them feel dumb for getting pregnant and constantly pestering them about moving out their house when majority of them are broke with no job or education.

    Also I’m still wondering why they didn’t go to college. If anything he could have went to school and if he was really as great of an athlete and had a good scholarship the school would have hooked up his girl. Did they not have a school counselor, a coach, or teacher to talk to because they obviously weren’t getting good advice from their family. His family seemed like the type to be riding the gravy train like they only wanted him to go to college and play ball and were hoping on the chance he’d go pro and they’d get money. Then he got Christina pregnant and their dreams were crushed because that money if he did make it would go to her and the baby and not them. So now they could careless if he went to school or not. That’s also why I thought his grandma wanted a DNA test because we all know that if a man has even the slightest doubt that the child is not his he is going to be very vocal about it. Maury got rich off of this exact fact. Never once did this boy act like that child wasn’t his.

    Lastly I’m wondering what is up with Christina and her mom’s relationship. Being pregnant is one of those times when a girl needs her mom the most. I understand the relative getting better but why leave your daughter in a situation where people constantly talk down to her every day and stress her out when she is pregnant. Maybe my relationship with my mom is just really close but when I found myself pregnant she had my boyfriend and myself move in with her so I wasn’t alone 600 miles away.

    You know I’m still really annoyed at his grandma as I’m typing this.
    .-= Kim´s last blog ..Over The Weekend =-.

  6. Jacqueline says:

    omg…my mouth was open the entire time. It is so sad when his family was just dissing Christina like that. They are probably upset because they were counting dollar signs in hopes of him going pro. They should know better than to be acting like that. Let that young man take care of his family. He needs to discuss that with his wife alone away from meddling grandma!

  7. My jaw was on the floor this ENTIRE show. I just couldn’t believe any of it…

    He so could have gone to school, and you know what? He should have. He could have still gotten married, and had the baby, and been a good dad. He would have just had to work harder.

    But, like you said, it goes back to not having the support. The behavior of his family was absolutely disgusting, and I can’t believe he didn’t put his foot down and tell them off for treating her that way. That’s HORRIBLE. I understand being upset with them BOTH for getting pregnant, but the hostility directed at her…?

    And Isiah’s twin sister who was supposed to be Christinna’s FRIEND?! Ugh.

    And I do think there was more to Christinna’s relationship with her mom. There had to have been! There’s no way that *I* would leave my child in an environment like that.
    .-= jess; [the bottle chronicles]´s last blog ..Cause he’s awesome =-.

  8. Ok Tara, I thought I was the only one reading too much into the episode!! I must admit when she pulled out the DNA test & Christinna walked out, I said oh no, don’t tell me he’s not the father! But once she spoke on camera alone about him needing to be a man, step up & ask her for it-couldn’t agree more because the whole time they were bad mouthing her indirectly, he would just sit there and say nothing, as if she made the baby appear on her own. He spent the money on speakers-shows his priorities, and being that they are in the south, I don’t think it would be that hard to attend another ‘football’ school.
    Just an additional note-when I was pregnant with my son, left my 1st semester of college to move back home, an Uncle of mine (whom I have no real relationship with!) stopped by my parent’s and made a comment that now being pregnant I will never be much in life/small window for my future. Safe to say that still bothers me because if I didn’t give up how is someone going to give up on me for me?!Sometimes having family around is not always equal to great support and it is up to the person in the mirror; sometimes one doesn’t know how strong they are until they have to stand alone.

  9. alls i have to say is that family totally disgusted me. that is all…