Haven’t we all been there? Minding our business, running errands or going to work and some woman on the bus says, “You look too young to be a mom.” What do you say? Check out this mom’s rant on the topic:
We’ve all been there
September 24, 2010 · by ·
I can sort of understand what she is going through. I had my son at the age of 28. But as I was getting older, everyone begin to ask when I was having kids. This was while I was single and after I got married. Me not having a child at an early age was my choice, just like it was the lady’s choice in the video to have her second at a young age. My mother cried at one point begging me to have a child. (I was about 25 and divorcing my 1st husband during this.) During the planning of my 2nd marriage we kept getting asked when we were going to start having kids. I wasnt even married yet. It really got on my nerves! I felt like I wasnt allowed to enjoy my husband before we started popping out kids! Now my son is 8 months and people started asking me when I was having my second child while I still on maternity leave!!! I was still in pain! It is no one business to ask when you are going to have children. They sure arent going to be up with you 3 AM in the morning to feed them!
I’ve been there many times…in fact, I was there this past Saturday. My son and I went with my mom and brother as she was shopping around for a new car. And the car saleswoman (I seriously HATE car sales people – they are SO pushy and bossy and irritating – anyway..) looked me up and down and said “You really don’t look old enough to have a kid”. Who gave her the right to decide if I look “old enough” to have a child?? I know I don’t look 22. That doesn’t erase the fact that I was in fact born 22 years ago. What is “old enough” to have a kid? What is “too old”? I agree with the mother in the video, the decision to have children or not have children is a very personal matter, not open to the public. It isn’t a group vote, it is a decision made by one or two people, depending on their family dynamic. It is NOT open for discussion or debate.
Yes.. when I was pregnant my fingers swelled and I couldn’t fit my wedding ring, and strangers would ask, “Are you and the father even still together?” Seriously? You’d ask another adult that question? My cousin who is only 4’10 said that women in stores would actually shake their head at her and her baby girl, one woman whispering, “Shame. Kids having kids.” My cousin was PAST 25… Even now, I’m a SAHM while hubby works so I always have the kids and people still look at me and turn up their noses, thinking that I’m a young, single mom.. Why are they even worried?? People think it’s okay to judge others, whether it’s for having kids, NOT having kids, being married parents, being single parents, being too YOUNG or too OLD… It’s no one’s business but the Mom and Dad! Stop judging us! We’re all fabulous!! 😀
Greetings ladies,
I think the behavior you all are describing is just flat out RUDE and disgusting—especially if they are doing it in front of school aged children that you must later explain what happened to. How rude!
Personally, I think this comes from our society’s cultural shift. More women are waiting until after they are 30 to start their families. Allot of men are now waiting too. So I think others automatically assume ESPECIALLY if you’re black that you are a single parent.
Well… what don’t kill you makes you stronger!
Soul Woman
http://homeiswithinsoulwoman.blogspot.com/
Yes, I’ve definitely been there! The worst for me was in the airport. The munchkin and I were traveling with my parents and they thought that we were both my parents’ children!
I just look at the positive side. While it’s a little annoying to be mistaken for my son’s sibling (especially when it’s coupled with rudeness), it means that I’m aging well! LOL!!
.-= Madged´s last blog ..A New Point of View =-.