At one year old, my son is the light of my life and I wish so much that I could go back and tell myself during those first few months that everything is going to be okay, that you won’t be changing diapers or nursing every half hour for the rest of your life. But since I can’t, I’d like to talk to you, new moms. This letter is for all of you dealing with your first newborn from someone who only recently made it through:
Dear new mom,
How I wish I could be there right now for you. I would wrap you up in my arms and tell you to just…breathe.
The world is not coming to an end. You will have your days and night back again and most of all, you are not going to lose your mind. It may feel like it now, I know. Those times when you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror and wonder where those dark bags came from and how you managed to age ten years in only a couple days: they may seem like an eternity now, but I promise, I promise, this will pass.
That precious little bundle you’re holding in your arms will only need you this much for a short time. It may not seem like that now. It may seem like you’ll be caught in this endless turning of diaper changes, nursing and sleepless days and nights forever, where you’re afraid to close a softly creaking door or clink a spoon in your coffee mug for fear of waking the baby. But there will come a day only months from now when he starts to do things for himself. He’ll start to roll, to sit up, to play with toys and crawl and, perhaps even before a single year has passed, he’ll be walking on his own and you’ll hold back the tears as you watch him walk away from you.
And then those sepia-toned memories will come back and you’ll remember holding him in the moonlight, and even though your hair wasn’t perfect and you can still feel the weight of sleepless nights on your eyes, you’ll miss those times when all he wanted in the world, all he cared about, was you.
Sweet, sweet girl, you are going to be fine. You are a champion already. Moms, even brand new ones, are the stuff that diamonds only wish they could be made of: beautiful, unbreakable and precious beyond words. You are a creature of strength and beauty and you, right now, are loved more than anyone else on earth.
Above all else, remember that there is a tomorrow. And that there will be a day after that, and another and another until one day you’ll look back and wonder where this little person, this budding human being with his funny laugh, fast little feet and blossoming language skills came from.
And even when he’s 20, 30, 50 years old, you’ll remember these first few months and how you held him in your arms and how he was, and still is, the most important person in your entire life.
Love,
Yourself only months down the road
In addition to being a mother, Kristin Hackler is a children’s book author, journalist and writer for eBay on topics related to parenting, family and home décor.