Comments on: all in the kool-aid and don’t know the flavor…

By: joy

joy — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 00:45:25 +0000

Oh this brings back memories, I got “what are you like the nanny or something” a lot. Now, I am 37 and my boy is 19 and in college himself.

Now being a young mom is great!

Good work with the blog, stay strong, hold your head high, it pays off.

By: Tara

Tara — Thu, 03 Dec 2009 04:00:23 +0000

@Arlice – Yeah, I found out later she was childless because “I was too busy working” (her words). I don’t care if that’s your choice, I would NEVER get in someone’s face because they decided not to have kids (at whatever age) so why get in mine because I did? Makes no sense, girl!

By: Arlice Nichole

Arlice Nichole — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 04:49:16 +0000

See, nuh unh! You are better than me because I would have had to go there with her! I bet she’s one of those who’s not married, wishes she was-with kids, and all she has is her career! How much you wanna bet?

Picture smoke blowing through my ears!

By: Tara

Tara — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 17:15:38 +0000

@Erykah – I wasn’t even thinking about parent/teacher interviews…Not looking forward to that. But I always think being a young mother makes you smarter. You have to be, to keep up with everything in your day.

By: Erykah

Erykah — Mon, 30 Nov 2009 14:55:24 +0000

I wish i could tell you that it gets better but it doesnt. I’m 33 and still get the odd looks and ill mannered comments (as a mother of a 12 yr old I gave birth at 20 also). The worst are parent teacher interviews, where school staff talk to you like you have the attention span of a three yr old. I guess they figure cause i look so young im also dumb too? it’s funny because they are now telling women to get pregnant sooner because infertility in your 30’s is becoming more prevalent.whenever someone gets judgemental or religious on my ass i tell them, “hey, the virgin mary was a teenaged unwed mother!”

By: Tara

Tara — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 17:00:37 +0000

@Tyquanna – See, I’m wondering what’s wrong with me, because I am WIPED OUT at the end of the day and I’m 24! If I was 30 or 40 having a baby…oooh wee! That poor baby! Mommy would have to go to bed right when they do!

By: Tara

Tara — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 16:54:31 +0000

@Latonya – I think as the years have gone by, I am more confident in my choice. Like you, we weren’t making much but you know what? We made it through. So why I had kids at the age that I did is really none of her business. You are right. People are nosy and mean for no reason.

By: Ms Bar B

Ms Bar B — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 19:49:06 +0000

Lol, ok, sounds like that lady has issue with motherhood in general. She founds like a chick who either had kids that she didn’t want OR wasn’t able to have any and is jealous of those who do. Either way, she was obviously an idiot and really not worth the time you gave her. Seriously. Don’t give people like that the satisfaction of getting you all worked up and/or hurting your feelings because, again, they’re idiots. You were at a conference so that should have been enough for her to see that you are obviously “old enough”. It really wasn’t any of her business about anything. Its not your job to have to be the token young mother who schools the fools about what it really means to be a young mother. Meaning, schooling folks should be a choice (like the creation of your blog) not a frickin’ requirement upon request.

See, now that heffa got me all worked up, lol.

By: Latonya

Latonya — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 16:18:04 +0000

I guess it is the way of our world. People are just nosy and mean for no reason. No one ever has the right to question the next person’s decision. I especially dislike when people give or try to give advice when no one asked for it. When my husband and I were married at 21 and 20, the first thing my family said was wait to have kids. We gave birth to our first daughter at 22 and 23, and I would do it again. I was still in school and we had a very small income, but we were and are happy with our choice. We gave birth to our second daughter at 26 and 24. I graduated with from college with 2 children. As I said before, I would not change a thing. Sure things could have possibly been better if we would have waited, but then again we could have possibly ended up without any children. So people should just back off, and evidently you were suppose to have your children when you did or they probably would not be here.

By: Tyquanna

Tyquanna — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 04:24:29 +0000

I must say that when I had my daughter at 20 and was still working my BA degree I didn’t have a care in the world. I was broke yet happy but now that I have a career and 32 pregnant with #2 I’m afraid of everything from what the pregnancy with do to my career to the health of the baby. I think you’re 20s is the best time to have kids just because of the energy level. I have my daughter who is planning to treat the baby like a doll so she has signed on to play with the baby.
I think I was protected from nosy people asking me about my business because of my razor sharp tongue. All you have to do to get someone off your back when they are getting to nosy is ask them something personal. Lol

By: Tara

Tara — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 01:00:30 +0000

@Cee Cee – Girl, what? Did they really say “Baby daddy”? Ooooh, that would have burned me up!

And as far as the lady goes, I do remember overhearing prior to our conversation that she didn’t have any kids. Don’t know if she was bitter about that or what, but really it’s not your place to comment on my life. Thanks.

By: Mrs. CJ aka Cee Cee

Mrs. CJ aka Cee Cee — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 17:02:04 +0000

And what is so surprising about having kids in your early twenties? She was talking like people didn’t become young parents in the 40’s and 50’s–wasn’t that kind of the norm back then?

By: Mrs. CJ aka Cee Cee

Mrs. CJ aka Cee Cee — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 16:54:12 +0000

Ugh, how rude of her! People like that make me think they are bitter about something. Why was she all up in your business, anyway? Nobody asked her. Maybe she has a daughter that had a baby as a teen, or maybe she could never have kids, or maybe she’s just nosey. Regardless of her reason for being so rude, it was not her place to comment.

I think as young mothers, we all go through this. You get it even more if you look young in the face. I wanted to talk to a doctor about and IUD, but couldn’t get my regular doc that day. So the new doctor I spoke to basically told me I needed to stop having sex or use a condom because I could also get an STD. I was so mad, and angrily flashed the fourth finger, left hand at her, and she apologized. And then, to add insult to injury, one of the nurses told me an IUD is great because it’s reversable, and if I ever got a new “Babydaddy” (yes, she did) we could have more if we’d like. I walked out of that office so fast. I was steaming mad.

By: Tara

Tara — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 14:35:21 +0000

@nicole – Yes, I remember those days of bringing the kid to class! What used to bug me is when my classmates wanted to hold her like she was a doll or something. I’m like, “If you really want to hold her, you can come to my apartment after class and hold her while I type this paper!” LOL. I got your e-mail about being featured – sure! You sound like you have a great story….

By: nicole

nicole — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 01:56:45 +0000

well said. i am a 25 year old college student and, when i have no one to watch my four month old, he joins me in class (my professors are fabulous) and, when i walk through the halls, i feel like a walking add for birth control.
and, while tom and i have discussed it, we are not married yet and, in public, it seems the older crowd looks down on people like that.
if anything, young mums are more fun… what 40 year old can keep up with an infant better than a 20something?