Another trick? I coordinate with my closest friends and my sisters. We constantly beg/borrow and yes even steal each others items. It keeps the wardrobe up to date and fly. Since I am the oldest sis, they seem to come to me for the more classic items. I go to them for the more trendy items. Sort of like our own private sisterhood of the traveling pants.

Additionally, and I really think this is important, I try not to shop alone. When you are a mother, particularly a new one, you often shop for yourself on the fly. You go to Target to buy pampers and . . . oh, that thong is cute. I need that.

The truth is that the industries have learned that moms like to do everything at once. Therefore they tend to put everything in one store and moms shop from one end to the other. The women’s clothes in these stores leave much to be desired, and the misses clothes tend to lack sophistication. So when you shop at these stores, you end up looking like the industries’ version of a suburban mom versus your version of a fly mom.

Try to make the time 1 FULL day/qtr to go out with your BF. Have lunch and shop. This way, you will purchase items that not only fulfill a need but also flatter. Instead of the $3 thong from target, you find a lingerie sale and find a $4 lace thong that will make hubby drool. Instead of $12 “these are kinda cute” shoes from Walmart, you might find some marked down leopard pumps on sale for $20.

If you know your day is coming up the 4th Sat in Jan, you can save towards that trip. Even though you know you are on a budget, you will find yourself making better purchases. PLUS your friend will not let you buy anything that makes you look frumpy.

But, I am a FLY mama…I don’t play! What I do about 4 times a year is hit up TJ Maxx, Marshalls, Ross and a few vintage shops in a really progressive, Bohemian-chic spot down here called Little Five Points. I rack up on some key items—jeans, cute tank tops, sexy sweaters, and occasionally, dresses—and I’m a high heel shoe wearing fanatic, so with all those things (and the benefit of not leaving my house every day, since I work from home mostly) I can give the illusion of fly, but in reality I recycle the same outfits over and over until they either get damaged, or disintegrate

If I’m totally honest with myself, I just really need to get my swagger back. I’m missing my swagger! Like you said, confidence is key. Blazers are also good. I need to pick up one or two for fall. I just feel like sometimes I shouldn’t wear something because HELLO I’m someone’s mama, but on the other hand, I don’t want to look like a little girl playing dress up with mommy’s business suits. It’s frustrating!

You can dress up any of these for work purposes. Good ways to dress them up is to layer (use splashes of color with tanks or blazers) and wear belts. Belts are good for covering our middle areas since they dont need to be worn tightly. Especially if you wear it over a dress. Just put it on, turn the buckle to the side, let it fall loosely and commence at looking fly.

I think overall, you will look fly in anything you are confident in. When others can sense your confidence, they won’t have a choice but to notice.

PS.. I’m LOL’ing hard at you doing single ladies. You.Betta.Work!! Truth be told, when I need a quick fierce-me-up (equivalent to a pick me up) I put on Beyonce’s Get me Bodied – the extended version where she describes the dances – and dance around in this jean skirt I have that i swear is too tight and short for somebody’s mama to wear, lol. When I’m feeling frisky I wear it out!! Ow!

My suggestion is take note from TLCs What Not To Wear. All it takes are a few good pieces that can be used for various occassions.